Comments on: Resentment, the Spiritual Time Killer and How to Avoid it http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/ Matching calamity with serenity Sun, 07 Mar 2010 15:05:31 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Avoiding Family Drama Over the Holidays | Spiritual Zen http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1676 Avoiding Family Drama Over the Holidays | Spiritual Zen Thu, 26 Nov 2009 21:46:49 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1676 [...] to. I know, I know, family is all we really have right? The least we can do is suffer through the resentment and guilt only family members know how to surgically inflict. We hurt the ones we love [...] [...] to. I know, I know, family is all we really have right? The least we can do is suffer through the resentment and guilt only family members know how to surgically inflict. We hurt the ones we love [...]

]]> By: Jared http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1378 Jared Sat, 12 Sep 2009 13:32:36 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1378 Yuro, Thanks for a different perspective on this. Well said about knowing how to appreciate happiness since you've experienced sadness. Yuro,
Thanks for a different perspective on this. Well said about knowing how to appreciate happiness since you’ve experienced sadness.

]]> By: Yuro http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1371 Yuro Fri, 11 Sep 2009 18:34:11 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1371 Well... that mean I am one of those people that said anger and resentment are good. I never believed that every bad feeling is bad whether it is anger, sadness, loneliness. I believe these the things that made me appreciate live, when happiness came, I know to appreciate it because I have gone through sadness. When my soulmate is there, I know to appreciate her because I have gone through loneliness. the trick is not to be overcome by resentment. Resentment is just a way to make you realize something that you don't want or something that you envy. Anyway this is just my thought on your post. Cheers... :) Well… that mean I am one of those people that said anger and resentment are good. I never believed that every bad feeling is bad whether it is anger, sadness, loneliness. I believe these the things that made me appreciate live, when happiness came, I know to appreciate it because I have gone through sadness. When my soulmate is there, I know to appreciate her because I have gone through loneliness. the trick is not to be overcome by resentment. Resentment is just a way to make you realize something that you don’t want or something that you envy. Anyway this is just my thought on your post. Cheers… :)

]]> By: Jared http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1315 Jared Wed, 02 Sep 2009 02:55:16 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1315 Jamie, I like the acronym for EGO as <strong>E</strong>asing <strong>G</strong>od <strong>O</strong>ut. But no matter what we believe in, our ego gets in the way of our usefulness to ourselves and those around us. Why does my ego get in the way? Most often because of fear, again, fear of loosing something I think I have (like security or money) or not getting something I think I want (like material things). The easiest way to deflate my ego, turn my attention to helping someone else. <strong>Self-pity and self-deprecation is still based in self</strong>. I'm still making everything about me, whether I'm the victim or not, that is just a label and I can either be a victim or a survivor, its my choice. As long as I'm a victim, I'm a spectator in my own life. I was that way for years, until the pain of living that way became too great, greater than the fear of trying something different. How I resolve resentments, <a href="http://www.spiritualzen.net/index.php/2009/03/09/practical-prayer/" rel="nofollow">prayer</a>. I pray for those I resent, I pray for them every single night on my knees before I go to bed. I pray that they have all the wonderful things in life I want for myself. I pray for them as long as it takes, sometimes days, and months. But at some point I find that I start to mean the things I'm praying for in my heart. Another way of reducing resentments, stop making unreasonable demands on myself and others. Now lowering expectations of others can be difficult, due to the fact that if we're still putting large expectations on others to fulfill something inside ourselves, then we have more work to do on ourselves. No one is responsible for my happiness, as I am not responsible for anyone else's happiness. The moment I think I am, well, that's just that crazy EGO poking its head in again. Stop being so hard on yourself, look around you right now in this moment and realize you're OK. Check out this post, <a href="http://bloomverse.com/blog/2009/08/right-now-you-dont-have-any-problems/" rel="nofollow">Right now you don’t have any problems</a>, from Craig over at <a href="http://bloomverse.com/blog/" rel="nofollow">Inward Bloom</a>. Jamie,
I like the acronym for EGO as Easing God Out. But no matter what we believe in, our ego gets in the way of our usefulness to ourselves and those around us. Why does my ego get in the way? Most often because of fear, again, fear of loosing something I think I have (like security or money) or not getting something I think I want (like material things). The easiest way to deflate my ego, turn my attention to helping someone else. Self-pity and self-deprecation is still based in self. I’m still making everything about me, whether I’m the victim or not, that is just a label and I can either be a victim or a survivor, its my choice. As long as I’m a victim, I’m a spectator in my own life. I was that way for years, until the pain of living that way became too great, greater than the fear of trying something different.

How I resolve resentments, prayer. I pray for those I resent, I pray for them every single night on my knees before I go to bed. I pray that they have all the wonderful things in life I want for myself. I pray for them as long as it takes, sometimes days, and months. But at some point I find that I start to mean the things I’m praying for in my heart. Another way of reducing resentments, stop making unreasonable demands on myself and others. Now lowering expectations of others can be difficult, due to the fact that if we’re still putting large expectations on others to fulfill something inside ourselves, then we have more work to do on ourselves. No one is responsible for my happiness, as I am not responsible for anyone else’s happiness. The moment I think I am, well, that’s just that crazy EGO poking its head in again.

Stop being so hard on yourself, look around you right now in this moment and realize you’re OK. Check out this post, Right now you don’t have any problems, from Craig over at Inward Bloom.

]]> By: jamie http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1314 jamie Tue, 01 Sep 2009 22:57:47 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1314 hi jared.i can pick up resentments over anything i mean anything.Looking at this when im in despair so to speak getting resentment out of my life seems like a hopeless task.I know the problem is in myself and down to low self esteem and a great big fat ugly ego which can be so suttle it seems that it can be of help which i know is a big lie that my messed up head puts together.The things you have wrote on here look helpfull and i am under no illusion that this stuff needs a lot of practice.(or is that my ego talking) Please could you send me some info on practicing some techniques to help me deflate my ego and resolve resentments as they can be part of my day to day life and create the other emotions to go with it anger, guilt,unhappiness and the big one FEAR..Many thanks for your site and look forward t hearing from you.Jamie hi jared.i can pick up resentments over anything i mean anything.Looking at this when im in despair so to speak getting resentment out of my life seems like a hopeless task.I know the problem is in myself and down to low self esteem and a great big fat ugly ego which can be so suttle it seems that it can be of help which i know is a big lie that my messed up head puts together.The things you have wrote on here look helpfull and i am under no illusion that this stuff needs a lot of practice.(or is that my ego talking) Please could you send me some info on practicing some techniques to help me deflate my ego and resolve resentments as they can be part of my day to day life and create the other emotions to go with it anger, guilt,unhappiness and the big one FEAR..Many thanks for your site and look forward t hearing from you.Jamie

]]> By: Jared http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1287 Jared Tue, 25 Aug 2009 22:23:10 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1287 Welcome Sue. Feel free to <a href="http://www.spiritualzen.net/index.php/contact/" rel="nofollow">email</a> me anytime about anything. Welcome Sue. Feel free to email me anytime about anything.

]]> By: Susan DeAngelis http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1286 Susan DeAngelis Tue, 25 Aug 2009 19:12:14 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1286 Hi, I'm a recovering alcoholic looking for friends and support. Sue Hi,
I’m a recovering alcoholic looking for friends and support.
Sue

]]> By: Jared http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1277 Jared Sun, 23 Aug 2009 22:08:36 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1277 Jonathan, Thanks for the comments, I love that "swimming inside the heart of others with forgiveness." Jonathan,
Thanks for the comments, I love that “swimming inside the heart of others with forgiveness.”

]]> By: jonathan figaro http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1276 jonathan figaro Sun, 23 Aug 2009 20:37:37 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1276 Practicing unconditional love is a nice way to remove the hate within your heart. We all have resentment against a old spouse, a new friend or a family member. Yet, me must remove this anger within our souls by swimming inside the heart of others with forgiveness. We must forgive all and forget all wrong that has been done to us. Do not use it as a excuse to live throughout life as a wandering generality. Allow you self to take responsibility for the situation and move on. Telling yourself, I am responsible ends the anger, resentment and hatred all at once. It stops all mental thought of a negative nature and bring an essence of LOVE! Practicing unconditional love is a nice way to remove the hate within your heart. We all have resentment against a old spouse, a new friend or a family member. Yet, me must remove this anger within our souls by swimming inside the heart of others with forgiveness. We must forgive all and forget all wrong that has been done to us. Do not use it as a excuse to live throughout life as a wandering generality. Allow you self to take responsibility for the situation and move on.

Telling yourself, I am responsible ends the anger, resentment and hatred all at once. It stops all mental thought of a negative nature and bring an essence of LOVE!

]]> By: Finola Prescott http://www.spiritualzen.net/2009/08/resentment-the-spiritual-time-killer-and-how-to-avoid-it/comment-page-1/#comment-1266 Finola Prescott Sat, 22 Aug 2009 02:24:01 +0000 http://www.spiritualzen.net/?p=797#comment-1266 See you both here or St. Lucia someday I hope - and thanks for popping over to my blog too :) Living here is something to be thankful for often, though I am known to discuss the way grass tends to look greener to me other places now n then :) See you both here or St. Lucia someday I hope – and thanks for popping over to my blog too :)

Living here is something to be thankful for often, though I am known to discuss the way grass tends to look greener to me other places now n then :)

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